Co-Parenting After Divorce Is Best For Children
Actress Gwyneth Paltrow and her former spouse, Coldplay front man Chris Martin, lit up social media outlets recently when they shared a family photo of themselves with their children. The former celebrity couple made headlines in 2014 when they announced they were “consciously uncoupling” after 10 years of marriage but would concentrate on co-parenting their two young children, ages 13 and 11.
Co-parenting is a term that has begun to weave its way into the fabric of society, and its emphasis on teamwork in the post-divorce raising of children is the big reason why. In this article, I explain some effective ways for parents to co-parent after divorce.
What Is Co-Parenting?
Simply put, co-parenting describes a joint parenting partnership between parents who are no longer romantically involved but share in the responsibility of raising their child. It emphasizes open communication, cooperation and flexibility among the parents. Co-parenting is not limited to divorced parents - but to any parents of minor children. In co-parenting situations, parents come to agreement on how their children will be raised, how decisions affecting their education, religion, health, and activities will be resolved. Basically, it is an agreed-upon roadmap and understanding that their children will be parented by both parents - and not just one parent.
Co-Parenting Focuses On The Children's Best Interest – Not On Each Parent!
How Does A PeacefulSplit® Mediation Lead To Better Co-Parenting?
As with co-parenting, the hallmarks of an effective divorce mediation experience are establishing communication and a sense of understanding. From the outset of the mediation process, Eric, as mediator, works to establish a model of respectful communication between you and your soon-to-be former spouse or partner. As part of the mediation process, I will guide you both through a discussion of each and every topic related to raising your children and making future decisions. My goal is to help you both explore these topics and create a workable and mutually agreed upon process for making all future decisions impacting your children. In co-creating this parenting plan together, it will only include decisions that you both agree; neither of you will have any decision or process imposed on you.
Mediations Creates An Environment For Mutual Respect And Agreement!
Do Children Really Benefit From Co-Parenting And Mediation?
In addition to helping parents find common ground on issues like child support, division of assets and debts, division of martial property, etc., the establishment of a respectful relationship among the parents is crucial to the mediation process – and especially the children.
When children are exposed to a verbally hostile relationship between parents, the results are often tragic and long-lasting. Recent studies confirm that children whose parents were not on speaking terms are at a higher risk of experiencing poorer health throughout their lives. Additionally, they are at risk of:
- Developing Destructive Behaviors;
- Isolating Themselves From Their Family And Friends;
- Developing Issues With Substance Abuse; and
- Having Thoughts Of Suicide Or Of Committing Violence.
At the opposite end of the spectrum, other research points to the success of post-divorce co-parenting. Among the findings, children who have enjoyed the nurturing environment of a parental relationship grounded in respect were shown to:
- Enjoy More Academic Success;
- Have A Better Sense Of Self-Esteem;
- Experience Far Less Instances Of Behavioral Problems; and
- Exhibit Fewer Occurrences Of Stress And Anxiety.
Mediation Focuses On Peace And Respect - Foundations For Healthy Parenting!
How Do I Find The Right Divorce Mediator For Us?
Divorce mediation is almost always mandated in Florida when your divorce is contested. Beyond committing to making the mediation process work, the most important step you can take is selecting the right Florida divorce mediator.
When making your selection, be sure to interview them in person, and base your selection on a mediator who is:
- Committed To Remaining A Neutral Third Party;
- Experienced Working With Parties Go Through Legal Disputes;
- Someone With A Calm Demeanor And Good With Problem Solving;
- Knowledgeable About Financial Matters;
- Possesses Advanced Training And Education In The Field Of Communications And Emotions;
- Dedicated To Making Decisions In The Best Interest Of Your Children; and
- Compassionate, Non-Judgmental and Sensitive To All Sides.